I'm Only Temporary

I’ve spent more mornings waking up blaming myself then falling asleep praying to God.
Enough said.
                    I wrote my confessions on a colony of balloons and gave it up to Christ.
Looking up after releasing, hoping on it’s arrival-
The child inside replied,
                                        “Lord, just let the wind blow me over into tomorrow."
Bandit eyes and a smile I stole from a 10 year old girl.
Arms flung; head screaming skyward
                                                              “This will be the end of me.”
We’ll both fight back the fact I don’t mean a thing and lack communication.
I’m inconsistent, despondent, with the emotion of a mannequin.

Hallelujah! I’m on a tight wire balancing between fiction and ferocity.
I’m facing the lions den and this time I won’t be saved merely out of mercy.
Gasps emerge from the mouths of the crowd really wishing to witness a  m i r a c l e
The last look I gave before I made eyelids crash into ocean currents - was one of desperation.
Closing of clouds averted nervous sights into the sky.

                             An hour away from a hurricane.
                              Then I’ll become a silhouette.
                             I’ll fade into infinity.

I was once held like a child letting go of their balloons
don’t
             l  e  t
                           g    o